On the surface of things, Republican vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin – who has served as governor of the state of Alaska for less than two years – appears to be a radical choice for the party. After all, she has a vagina and is rising through the ranks faster than many men in her party; that fact in itself is revolutionary for the GOP. As soon as one has digested that bit, however, he will notice that her nomination is nothing more than business as usual for the Republican Party. Governor Palin is a red-blooded modern Republican through and through: she is a feverishly pro-life, card-carrying member of the NRA who has been calling for the termination of the federal government's ban on oil drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge for quite some time. This "business as usual" label, however, lies not so much in Palin's policy preferences as her party's infinite ability to talk out of both sides of its very large and very loud collective mouth.
You see, the GOP's most common attack on Barack Obama is that, as a one-term U.S. senator, he is simply not experienced enough to serve as president. Now comes the news that the oldest candidate for president in U.S. history – a man who has battled near-constant health problems for ten-plus years, a man who also has shown at least five of the ten warning signs of Alzheimer's disease and a man whose father and grandfather both died suddenly of heart attacks – has chosen a self-declared "hockey mom" with less than half a term as governor of Alaska under her belt as his prospective vice president. The vice president, of course, is the person with the crappiest job in the higher reaches of our federal government. John Adams, the first vice president of the U.S., once described it as "the most insignificant office that ever the invention of man contrived." Why did future president Adams feel this way? Well, basically because the vice president doesn't do anything. The primary responsibility of the vice president (as vested by the Constitution, not Dick Cheney) is to do as little as possible unless he is called upon to fill the shoes of the president, in which case he is expected to be as ready as the disabled president was. In other words, the vice president is basically a well-paid understudy to the actual president in case the president cannot fulfill his duties. What are we to make of the Palin nomination then? If I'm not mistaken, the Republican Party appears to have hired Dakota Fanning to be Sir Anthony Hopkins' understudy for a new production of Richard III. Is it just me, or did John McCain just turn himself into the political world's very own Max Bialystock?
Why is any of this vice presidential stuff important in the first place? Well, the cold hard reality, folks, is that John McCain's age and health are completely legitimate factors in assessing his ability to competently serve the highest office in the land, if not the world. Whether it's politically correct to discuss publicly or not, the fact is that Senator McCain's extensive medical history, along with well-known contemporary medical statistics, means there is a much higher probability that John McCain would be unable to complete his term in office than any previous first-time presidential candidate in U.S. history. That simple fact alone makes Senator McCain's choice for vice president much more important than Senator Obama's choice for vice president. Despite the obviously greater need to choose a running mate who is ready to be president immediately, Senator McCain and the Republican Party approved the nomination of somebody who is even less ready to serve as president than Barack Obama, whom the GOP has constantly accused of not being ready to serve as president. The fact that McCain was willing to choose somebody who is even less experienced than Barack Obama to serve as U.S. president in the instance of an emergency displays incredibly poor judgment on the part of Republican candidate; in turn, this incredibly poor judgment should be a major concern – and a major roadblock – to anybody who is considering not voting for Obama simply because he lacks experience.
Of course, this selection is par for the Republican Party's well manicured course: they firmly believe that the same thing that constitutes a weakness or fault in an opponent does not constitute a weakness or fault in themselves. How will the GOP justify placing somebody so unqualified within a heartbeat of the White House? I'm guessing the same way they do anything: they'll just make up shit and talk in circles! I can see it already (because I've seen it countless times before): they will cry that "Barack Obama is not ready to lead because he lacks experience," of course; and then, when called out for hiring somebody wholly unqualified to replace an elderly man with near-chronic health problems in the most important job in the country, the GOP will respond that "Governor Palin's even smaller résumé of governmental experience is not a weakness because she has [insert artificial GOP-created reason here]. Besides, she's running only for vice president." It's the only thing the GOP knows how to do: accuse others of having the very glaring faults they possess themselves – and then continue to do so until the public consciousness is beaten senseless.
Do you doubt my claim? Please – it took me over an hour just to decide where to start! How about this anecdote: just a few weeks ago on CBS' "Face the Nation," former GOP assassin turned political "analyst" Karl Rove, discussing the rumors that first-term Virginia governor Tim Kaine would be selected as Barack Obama's running mate, told Bob Schieffer that Obama
The implication is obvious: Barack Obama would choose a vice presidential running mate based solely on how many votes this running mate would bring to the ticket while John McCain would do the exact opposite and choose somebody who is qualified and ready to stand in for the president because John McCain is so experienced, so responsible and always so ready to put country before politics or his party or especially himself. (*sigh* what a dreamboat that John McCain is!) Lo and behold, three weeks later, it's Barack Obama who has chosen his running mate, Senator Joe Biden (of the critically strategic state of Delaware, that is), based on the strength of his extensive congressional résumé while John McCain has shamelessly attempted to woo the uncompromising members of the Religious Right along with still-disgruntled Hillary Clinton supporters by choosing the uniquely unqualified Sarah Palin as his running mate. Does that seem almost unbelievably absurd and hypocritical? Of course it does, but again, that's merely business as usual for the Republican Party. (And, oh by the way, Karl: please name one big, important fucking thing she's ever done as governor of Alaska. What was that Karl – I couldn't hear you.) One piece of evidence not enough? Here's another one: the Republican Party – with a collective straight face – has had the audacity to tell the American people during this campaign that they should fear runaway government spending by Barack Obama and the Democrats – never mind the fact that we just recently spent six years under a federal government run exclusively by a Republican Party that ran up the largest budget deficit in the history of the country. See how it works? The GOP recklessly spends money for six years and then runs for office on a platform of "fiscal responsibility" and "reform." By Republican campaign logic, then, their slogan should be simple enough to remember: "The only way to get us out is to vote us in!" Folks, insanity this fucking insane is nothing more than a living, breathing self-writing and extremely unfunny punch line. But it's what Republicans do. And they seem to do it 24/7. It's the only way they can ever get votes: to create a lie or unfounded fear, and then repeat it over and over and over – with the help of the right-wing loving mainstream media, that is – until voters simply give in to the mantra (see the habitually misquoted Al Gore of 2000 & the character-assassinated John Kerry of 2004 for proof).
Now we have John McCain's selection of Sarah Palin as his vice-presidential running mate, a choice that simply continues the patently hypocritical Republican way of business. They have been squealing at the top of their lungs that Barack Obama is not "ready to lead," yet announce today that the person they have chosen as their backup president is younger and less experienced – or less "ready to lead," if you prefer – than Barack Obama. And again, the Republican Party does all of this without a trace of evidence that they are aware that this choice undercuts their very own message. Of course, the Republican Party can pull off this magic trick as many times as they wish since the mainstream media almost never points out the fact that the GOP talks out of both sides of its mouth virtually all the time – but that's a matter for an entirely different entry. This time could be different, however; even I am not convinced the McCain-loving mainstream media will be able to provide McCain cover from the consequences of this blunder. All of which means that the person who stands to lose the most by this selection is the selection herself. The reality is that Sarah Palin is exactly the kind of politician conservative voters love: she's a tough-talking, no-nonsense achiever with a matching set of uncompromising political views. And she's also already being investigated for ethics violations in Alaska, though I can't say all conservatives love their politicians to be unethical scoundrels (it just seems that way). Unfortunately for Sarah Palin, she now stands a good chance of becoming a political casualty of the very standards created by her own party to kill Barack Obama's candidacy.
You see, the GOP's most common attack on Barack Obama is that, as a one-term U.S. senator, he is simply not experienced enough to serve as president. Now comes the news that the oldest candidate for president in U.S. history – a man who has battled near-constant health problems for ten-plus years, a man who also has shown at least five of the ten warning signs of Alzheimer's disease and a man whose father and grandfather both died suddenly of heart attacks – has chosen a self-declared "hockey mom" with less than half a term as governor of Alaska under her belt as his prospective vice president. The vice president, of course, is the person with the crappiest job in the higher reaches of our federal government. John Adams, the first vice president of the U.S., once described it as "the most insignificant office that ever the invention of man contrived." Why did future president Adams feel this way? Well, basically because the vice president doesn't do anything. The primary responsibility of the vice president (as vested by the Constitution, not Dick Cheney) is to do as little as possible unless he is called upon to fill the shoes of the president, in which case he is expected to be as ready as the disabled president was. In other words, the vice president is basically a well-paid understudy to the actual president in case the president cannot fulfill his duties. What are we to make of the Palin nomination then? If I'm not mistaken, the Republican Party appears to have hired Dakota Fanning to be Sir Anthony Hopkins' understudy for a new production of Richard III. Is it just me, or did John McCain just turn himself into the political world's very own Max Bialystock?
Why is any of this vice presidential stuff important in the first place? Well, the cold hard reality, folks, is that John McCain's age and health are completely legitimate factors in assessing his ability to competently serve the highest office in the land, if not the world. Whether it's politically correct to discuss publicly or not, the fact is that Senator McCain's extensive medical history, along with well-known contemporary medical statistics, means there is a much higher probability that John McCain would be unable to complete his term in office than any previous first-time presidential candidate in U.S. history. That simple fact alone makes Senator McCain's choice for vice president much more important than Senator Obama's choice for vice president. Despite the obviously greater need to choose a running mate who is ready to be president immediately, Senator McCain and the Republican Party approved the nomination of somebody who is even less ready to serve as president than Barack Obama, whom the GOP has constantly accused of not being ready to serve as president. The fact that McCain was willing to choose somebody who is even less experienced than Barack Obama to serve as U.S. president in the instance of an emergency displays incredibly poor judgment on the part of Republican candidate; in turn, this incredibly poor judgment should be a major concern – and a major roadblock – to anybody who is considering not voting for Obama simply because he lacks experience.
Of course, this selection is par for the Republican Party's well manicured course: they firmly believe that the same thing that constitutes a weakness or fault in an opponent does not constitute a weakness or fault in themselves. How will the GOP justify placing somebody so unqualified within a heartbeat of the White House? I'm guessing the same way they do anything: they'll just make up shit and talk in circles! I can see it already (because I've seen it countless times before): they will cry that "Barack Obama is not ready to lead because he lacks experience," of course; and then, when called out for hiring somebody wholly unqualified to replace an elderly man with near-chronic health problems in the most important job in the country, the GOP will respond that "Governor Palin's even smaller résumé of governmental experience is not a weakness because she has [insert artificial GOP-created reason here]. Besides, she's running only for vice president." It's the only thing the GOP knows how to do: accuse others of having the very glaring faults they possess themselves – and then continue to do so until the public consciousness is beaten senseless.
Do you doubt my claim? Please – it took me over an hour just to decide where to start! How about this anecdote: just a few weeks ago on CBS' "Face the Nation," former GOP assassin turned political "analyst" Karl Rove, discussing the rumors that first-term Virginia governor Tim Kaine would be selected as Barack Obama's running mate, told Bob Schieffer that Obama
would pick a Red State Democrat, because I think he's going to make an intensely
political choice, not a governing choice. He's going to view this through a
prism of a candidate, not through the prism of President. That is to say, he's
going to pick somebody that he thinks on the margin will help him in a state
like Indiana or Missouri or Virginia. He's not going to be thinking big and
broad about the responsibilities as President. Well, with all due respect again
to Gov. Kaine, he's been a governor for three years. He's been able but
undistinguished; I don't think people could really name a big, important thing
that he's done. [emphasis added]
The implication is obvious: Barack Obama would choose a vice presidential running mate based solely on how many votes this running mate would bring to the ticket while John McCain would do the exact opposite and choose somebody who is qualified and ready to stand in for the president because John McCain is so experienced, so responsible and always so ready to put country before politics or his party or especially himself. (*sigh* what a dreamboat that John McCain is!) Lo and behold, three weeks later, it's Barack Obama who has chosen his running mate, Senator Joe Biden (of the critically strategic state of Delaware, that is), based on the strength of his extensive congressional résumé while John McCain has shamelessly attempted to woo the uncompromising members of the Religious Right along with still-disgruntled Hillary Clinton supporters by choosing the uniquely unqualified Sarah Palin as his running mate. Does that seem almost unbelievably absurd and hypocritical? Of course it does, but again, that's merely business as usual for the Republican Party. (And, oh by the way, Karl: please name one big, important fucking thing she's ever done as governor of Alaska. What was that Karl – I couldn't hear you.) One piece of evidence not enough? Here's another one: the Republican Party – with a collective straight face – has had the audacity to tell the American people during this campaign that they should fear runaway government spending by Barack Obama and the Democrats – never mind the fact that we just recently spent six years under a federal government run exclusively by a Republican Party that ran up the largest budget deficit in the history of the country. See how it works? The GOP recklessly spends money for six years and then runs for office on a platform of "fiscal responsibility" and "reform." By Republican campaign logic, then, their slogan should be simple enough to remember: "The only way to get us out is to vote us in!" Folks, insanity this fucking insane is nothing more than a living, breathing self-writing and extremely unfunny punch line. But it's what Republicans do. And they seem to do it 24/7. It's the only way they can ever get votes: to create a lie or unfounded fear, and then repeat it over and over and over – with the help of the right-wing loving mainstream media, that is – until voters simply give in to the mantra (see the habitually misquoted Al Gore of 2000 & the character-assassinated John Kerry of 2004 for proof).
Now we have John McCain's selection of Sarah Palin as his vice-presidential running mate, a choice that simply continues the patently hypocritical Republican way of business. They have been squealing at the top of their lungs that Barack Obama is not "ready to lead," yet announce today that the person they have chosen as their backup president is younger and less experienced – or less "ready to lead," if you prefer – than Barack Obama. And again, the Republican Party does all of this without a trace of evidence that they are aware that this choice undercuts their very own message. Of course, the Republican Party can pull off this magic trick as many times as they wish since the mainstream media almost never points out the fact that the GOP talks out of both sides of its mouth virtually all the time – but that's a matter for an entirely different entry. This time could be different, however; even I am not convinced the McCain-loving mainstream media will be able to provide McCain cover from the consequences of this blunder. All of which means that the person who stands to lose the most by this selection is the selection herself. The reality is that Sarah Palin is exactly the kind of politician conservative voters love: she's a tough-talking, no-nonsense achiever with a matching set of uncompromising political views. And she's also already being investigated for ethics violations in Alaska, though I can't say all conservatives love their politicians to be unethical scoundrels (it just seems that way). Unfortunately for Sarah Palin, she now stands a good chance of becoming a political casualty of the very standards created by her own party to kill Barack Obama's candidacy.
