Friday, November 10, 2006

George W. Bush Attains Enlightenment

Well, folks, perhaps there are such things as miracles. On Wednesday, November 8, 2006, before our very eyes -- and recorded for all of us to repeat for verification -- was President George W. Bush reaching complete enlightenment. Yes, the same man who asked the question, "Is our children learning?", the same man who wanted never to have to make explanations that he couldn't explain, and the same man who urged fanatical, blood-thirsty, suicidal extremists to come out and try to kill members of his own military, has reached enlightenment. Simply put: the impossible is now reality. The proof of Bush's elevation to enlightenment came in a press conference after control of the House of Representatives had been seized by the rival Democrats, wherein Bush pondered the previous day's events with evidence of his new-found wisdom:

"I thought we [Republicans] had a pretty good shot . . . shows what I know!"

Yes, George, the 2006 mid-term elections showed everybody exactly what you know: absolutely nothing. Enjoy your last two years in office, fuckface!

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